Dec 2024 heart pain,but with smiles

Hi everyone, I’m here just to share normally the month of December will be my every year looking forward to Ohana Holidays. Well, I guess by now some of you know already that December will be my father's birthday month and my little brother's birthday month for both my favorite men. 

This year Hamzah plan something different we're going two places, and of course I agreed because KL and Kuching Sarawak have Anding we all haven't met him since COVID, so I can imagine how long already. We only keep in touch by IG or WhatsApp, alah just like both each other's posts and a few DMs by commenting on them. Oh, by the way, Sarawak, only 3 people went. We cut the trip short because my little brother left his cap at KL and also while at Sarawak out in ternary, boring more to healing marathon drama and eating. 

Ok I cut the story short. After we spent time with Anding on Saturday morning until afternoon, we went back to KL again. Anyway, I just want to say thank you, Anding for bringing us around for a while and treating us like your own family. 

We stay for another few days before we get back,Singapore 

Ok, now let’s share about the situation ship and what happened in the end. The person married his choice, the ex-girlfriend at last, and the best part is that his wedding date falls on my dad's birthday, which is very easy for me to remember their anniversary soon. Oh, this is the best part of how I made that will be my last day to meet and see him from far just to respect and no war on his big day. Yes, I am someone who loves to see my beloved married, even though my heart is broken into what I also don’t know keke. But that is the best feeling for me, so that all I see with my own eyes.

Well, for now, I’m trying my best to distract my feelings, even though thought I know it's very hard to move on, but I will try my best by busying myself and focusing on my next Hijra journey. Being on that path also has a lot of obstacles; I need to be strong with it. May Allah will always protect me and forgive me. So for now we just be game friends; nothing much. As for me, I will always have my own boundaries when all this situation comes in. For someone like me at my current age, switching on and off the emo button really is not easy; it is very fatigue. When crying more also tired than if never cry also feel pain the eyes too dry suddenly🤦‍♀️

Later, I will continue again… 

Happy New Year, everyone! This year, for the first time, I started work late, 1 week. I still haven't told my boss I got MC for 1 year due to my condition. The truth is, can I still want to work as per normal? Just this, I might work on off instead of 4 days or 5 days in a week again. This kind of thing is not easy for me. I need $ for some bills and essentials for both of us. Well, for now, I still reconsider about it. 

The End…