Im back again, this time will be more just like these. I want a positive day for me first day and new year but it turns up im in pain with my left eyes suddenly.
Im panic and overthinking again if my eyes something wrong will there be someone still want me and love me. Im angry where to get $ for eye pain not again i feel guilty have to use my parents money. Why me always being test sickness in pain. And by the way im having another pain my tooth gum also in pain until i don’t know which to cure first. Again im not scolding anyone i am just scolding myself why i have to go through these. Im angry with my own bodysystem too, imagine since small i have my own timing sleeping and awake mode. I want to kill those timing again not easy. Sometime i feel want to quit work not because of i hate my job or boss it just want to start back my religion thing that im scared something will happen to me if once i start all again. Im not multitask person can like monday to friday work than weekend go other thing my body cannot take it and cannot focus too how???
Sometime i have to fight a voice too said eh wati why u need to work at the end of the day your $ still not enough for urself and ur loved one too every night u will feel guilty again and again than cry until fall sleep. I really feel tired already may i still can stay stronger for another 364 days to go 😢😢😢.😢 I really don’t want to sick and bare all this pain im tired already😞😞😞😞 am i fate to be alone already beside death i know of course im alone.
Now Im thinking of $ again she need it for school thing and i no idea how to help her, i don’t like the feel in debt even with my own family😢😢😢😢
Im sad and tired already with all these pain, im not strong😞
The End...
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